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Posts Tagged ‘Inner Resilience’

There are indeed times when the harsh slings and arrows of Life weigh one’s soul down with woe. The intensity of each succeeding sling shot becomes more acute. The frequency also registers an uptick. Life seems to be overtaken with a Thos-like propensity – to test the depth of one’s reserves of patience and fortitude. It appears as if each arrow is doused in paraffin and is being shot by an Edwin the Scout to douse an already raging fire in one’s cottage. One’s Guardian Angels appear to have gone off on a long vacation. The air is congested with a series of W-shaped depressions which keep hitting one at regular intervals. Even before one has had a chance to pull oneself out of the preceding episode, the next one follows, leaving one all of a twitter. The soul remains in a phase of perennial torment.

When faced with a situation of this nature, one has two options. One can either wallow in self-pity, question one’s Guardian Angels as to what one has done to deserve a harsh treatment of the kind being dished out, and generally keep looking for shoulders which would not look askance at the prospect of getting wet with one’s tears. Or, one can start exploring the possibility of clawing one’s way back up the cesspool of darkness one finds oneself in.

In case the latter option suits one’s temperament, there could be no better way to beat the blues than to immerse oneself in one’s work with a renewed vigour and enthusiasm.

Besides, the following actions, if taken, might make one realize that one should never repine, never despair, and never allow the upper lip to unstiffen, come what may.

  1. Remaining in touch with the loved ones, who care and share.
  2. Being surrounded by those who bring some sunshine into one’s life. Warm hugs and embraces perk one up no end.
  3. Having advisors like Jeeves around whose keen intelligence and resourcefulness may enrich one’s life.
  4. Calling upon the services of pals like Bertie Wooster who would never let one down.
  5. Treating oneself with a daily dose of some Larsen Exercises, making an acquaintance like Ashe Marson proud.
  6. Trying to break the mould and doing something one has never done before; visiting far off places, meeting new people, and indulging in such heavenly pursuits which had so far remained pious intentions. These could even include such acts as pinching umbrellas and policemen’s helmets.
  7. Avoiding the company of aunts who feast on glass bottles and happen to be lionesses in the garb of sheep. Instead, getting oneself invited to lairs which boast of an Anatole on the premises.
  8. Standing up to a bully like Roderick Spode and giving him a piece of one’s mind; provided, of course, one has access to a Eulalie-like secret.
  9. If one belongs to the tribe of the delicately nurtured, one may like the company of someone configured along the lines of Rupert Psmith.
  10. If one is instead from the tribe of the so-called sterner sex, one may like the company of an Emerald Stoker, a soothing and sympathetic girl one can take one’s troubles to, thereby being confident of having one’s hand held and one’s head patted. However, it may help to avoid the company of persons built along the lines of Florence Craye, Honoria Glossop, Roberta Wickham or Stiffy Byng.
  11. Curling up in bed with one’s favourite whodunit, preferably with a tissue restorative by one’s side, and with soothing music softly playing in the background.
  12. Remembering that this phase too shall pass, as the wise men have said!

Overall, one may like to brood upon the singular advantage one’s Guardian Angels have conferred on one – that of facing harsher slings and arrows of Life. The perks of such a fate are many. One develops a spiritual outlook towards life, that too at a faster pace, much like the clergymen who come in contact with Master Thos. Nerves of chilled steel get developed. One’s inner resilience improves, leaving one less prone to distress of any kind in future. One develops a tendency to focus on the sunnier side of life. The inner will to live life to the hilt gets back on its throne. The brow is no longer furrowed. Rather than believing oneself to be a victim of circumstances, one learns to go with the flow of life, adapting to change. One learns to respond to life gracefully, with ease.

One may then look north, south, east and west and discover not a single cloud on the horizon. One realizes that no matter how dark the skies may be, the sun would be shining somewhere and will eventually come smiling through; just like Bertie Wooster says somewhere in his memoirs!

(Related Post: https://ashokbhatia.wordpress.com/2016/12/10/shopping-therapy-and-some-plummy-techniques-to-treat-depression)

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Those exposed to the vicissitudes of a manager’s life often get unduly perturbed about the people around them, or the circumstances and formidable challenges they face in their careers.

But think of it. A manager would strongly protest if another one is made to occupy the office space assigned to her. Why, even a parking space allocation could disturb office harmony! The boss, spending a lot of time with a favourite manager of hers, could create a sense of envy amongst other managers; it could even initiate a chain of rumours and lead to animated discussions at the coffee machine.

Envy, jealousy, hatred, unbridled ambition – all of these happen to be strong undercurrents which could be detected within an outwardly quiet and serene looking manager. Given a chance, managers, like politicians and other professionals, would never cede even a square inch of their turf to someone else.

But if so, one may well ask as to how managers end up permitting others to enter their mental space and cause internal turbulence, often losing a well-earned peaceful sleep at night. They suffer at the hands of a boss or a colleague whom they have come to trust. They get swayed by external circumstances and people, losing their mental equipoise and balance in the process. This obfuscates their vision and disturbs their thinking processes. At times, such negative occurrences even chip off a part of their own self-confidence as well.

Tough bosses routinely rebuke their team members but end up affecting different people differently. Those with a lower self-esteem and a lower Inner Resilience might even contemplate taking a drastic step under external provocation, in some cases leading even to homicidal thoughts. But those who are wired differently might just take such occurrences in their stride, just shrugging off, noticing the underlying lessons and going ahead with the task at hand in a more effective manner.

Higher Inner Resilience is a stress buster

This shows the importance for a manager to have a high degree of Inner Resilience within her mental makeup. This way, she retains her sense of self-esteem. Her perception of reality remains balanced and objective. She is able to punch the right buttons and take better decisions. She owns her actions and takes responsibility for what she does. She does not gloat in a success, attributing it only to her own efforts and initiatives. Nor does she get unduly depressed when faced with failure. The tendency to blame other people or circumstances for her failures does not appeal to her. Instead, a pitiless analysis of the situation at hand gets done. A bout of introspection is attempted.

Her anxiety and stress levels are low. She is more likely to remain in the pink of health. This enables her to live her life to the hilt. An inner bliss is often experienced.

Much like a person who enters the sea for a swim, she is aware that it involves handling mighty waves. Also, that the water is not sweet. So, she is better prepared. Likewise, a manager who possesses a high degree of Inner Resilience is better prepared to handle challenges in her career, whether mighty or otherwise.

In other words, she is smarter than those around herself, better equipped to break the glass ceiling and make it to the higher echelons of an organization.

The risk of Sensitivity

Managers who are sensitive to others’ needs do not necessarily make better bosses. Emotions could cloud their judgement, thereby lowering their level of Inner Resilience. An excess of the Milk of Human Kindness sloshing about in the veins could make them lose their effectiveness as a manager. Moderation is what the doctor would recommend.

However, when Sensitivity gets deployed in tandem with Rational Thought, as drawn from the company’s objectives and policies, they end up being realistically empathic.

Another way of conveying this delicate balance is by the means of a Blake Mouton Grid, which is built upon two dimensions – Concern for People and Concern for Production. Add to this the third dimension – that of Concern for Ethics – and one gets somewhat closer to the quality which the Bhagavad Gita refers to as equipoise.

Learning from Bhagavad Gita

Lord Krishna explains this beautifully to Arjuna. In verse 38 of Chapter 2 of the Bhagavad Gita, He says:

सुखदु:खे समे कृत्वा लाभालाभौ जयाजयौ |
ततो युद्धाय युज्यस्व नैवं पापमवाप्स्यसि || 38||

sukha-dukhe same kitvā lābhālābhau jayājayau
tato yuddhāya yujyasva naiva
pāpam avāpsyasi

‘Having made pleasure and pain, gain and loss, victory and defeat the same, engage in battle for the sake of battle; thus, you shall not incur sin.’

When it comes to understanding the happenings around us, this inner equilibrium is the key facilitator. By attaining this state, a manager can shore up her Spiritual Quotient, of which Inner Resilience is a critical component.

Building up Inner Resilience

Meditative practices help. So does a realization that one is acting as per one’s own conscience and what one believes to be right. In other words, one is following one’s ‘swa-dharma’.

The ability and openness to appreciate a deemed adversary’s view point also helps.

Ignoring people with a negative persona and consciously choosing to remain in the company of some positive thinkers assists.

An attitude of ‘This too shall pass’ helps.

Above all, the wisdom gained from the harsh slings and arrows of Life supports in this endeavour. It follows that introspection helps.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Pressure is an ‘external’ stimulus. Stress is what ‘we’ experience. The level of stress we experience therefore is directly proportional to the pressure we receive. The good news is that stress is inversely proportional to our inner strength and resilience.

Since each individual is uniquely configured, the response of each person to the same level of pressure would be different. Some would take it lightly and focus on the action at hand, thereby improving their chances of a better and quicker delivery of results. Others would take it seriously, and jeopardize their own achievements and career. Those who are ever-anxious and have an ‘A’ type personality would invariably experience more stress than those who are the happy-go-lucky ‘B’ types.

Stress experienced by a professional is also a function of time. The psychological condition varies with time and also plays a role.

To sum up, a mathematical formulation for stress could qualitatively be along the following lines:

stress

Distress can be handled positively. Art of creative dissatisfaction, loosening up and letting go, a habit of forgiveness, a dash of humour, and meditation can help.

A little bit of stress is good for a professional’s health and output. Thanks to Richard Lazarus and Hans Selye, we understand the distinction between ‘eustress’ and ‘distress’!

(Excerpt from my book ‘Surviving in the Corporate Jungle’, the English version of which was released recently. The Portuguese version of the excerpt follows.)

 

STRESS

A pressão é um estímulo “externo”. O stress é o que “nós” sentimos. O nível de stress que sentimos, portanto, é diretamente proporcional à pressão que recebemos. A boa notícia é que o stresse é inversamente proporcional à nossa
força interior e resiliência.

Como cada indivíduo tem uma configuração única, a resposta de cada um ao mesmo nível de pressão será diferente. Alguns conseguem aceitar a pressão de ânimo leve, concentrando-se naquilo que estão a fazer e aumentando, assim, as suas probabilidades de uma execução mais rápida e com melhores resultados. Outros levam a pressão demasiado a sério, pondo em perigo as suas próprias realizações e carreira. Aqueles que estão sempre ansiosos e têm uma personalidade do tipo A sofrem invariavelmente de mais stresse do que os ‘deixa-andar’ do tipo B.

O stress que um profissional sente é também uma função do tempo. A condição psicológica varia com o tempo e também desempenha um papel.

É possível lidar com a angústia de forma positiva. A arte da insatisfação criativa, soltar-se e deixar andar, o hábito de perdoar, uma pitada de humor e meditação, tudo isso pode ajudar.

Um pouco de stress é bom para a saúde e para os resultados de um profissional.  Graças a Richard Lazarus e Hans Selye, sabemos distiguir o ‘eustress’ (stress bom) do ‘distress’ (stress mau)!

(This is how you can lay your hands on the Portuguese version of the book, launched in Portugal during March, 2016.)

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Those who practice as physicians in our society are increasingly looked upon with some suspicion. Dig a little deeper and one is apt to find that they are more to be pitied than to be censured.

A physician is denied the fundamental right to some solitude. Even at a social gathering, she is likely to be surrounded by wannabe patients who are keen to seek her impromptu advice as to the latest affliction the party of the other part has heard about and imagines oneself to be suffering from the same.

Close relatives are not too considerate either. A distant relative could call late at night, skillfully steering the conversation from children’s career prospects to the current bout of migraine she happens to be suffering from. If anyone in the circle of friends or relatives happens to be admitted to a hospital, the physician ends up spending sleepless nights, adroitly juggling her official commitments and personal relations, often messing up both.

Latest advancements in medicine keep them on their toes. So does the competition from various streams of medicine, such as Homeopathy, Ayurveda, Unani, Siddha and many other local variants of each of these streams. Superstitions, local beliefs, religion, social norms are but some of the constraints which need to be kept in mind. Legal tangles, such as those apply to road accident cases, keep them on the defensive.

In advanced countries, they face tough customer care regulations. In emerging economies like India, they suffer humiliation – occasionally violent – at the hands of irate relatives and well-wishers if the latter perceive the medical service provided to their kith and kin to be deficient.

Return on Investment considerations

To be a mere graduate in any discipline of medicine does not amount to much these days. Even to become a graduate, the hapless souls have to experience at least five and a half years of the tyranny of the classroom, with the trauma of a stint as an intern thrown in for good measure.

Monetary rewards obviously vary depending upon their choice of a career. They could choose to be in their own private practice, or join a private sector outfit, or become a part of the public health delivery mechanism.

If public spending on health infrastructure is woefully inadequate, private players end up playing an important role in the medical education scenario. Many aspiring physicians opt for a private sector skill provider. As a consequence, hassled parents end up shelling out sackfuls of the green stuff. Return on Investment considerations then determine the choice of their career.

The blue-eyed ones

The resourceful ones set up their own practice. If the going is good, some of them end up laughing all the way to the bank, what with hefty commissions coming in from such allied medical service providers as marketeers of branded medicines and diagnostic clinics.

Those who happen to be associated with five-star private sector health facilities have tough business targets to meet. This is not to say that patient care necessarily gets compromised, but an overdose of medical investigations surely leaves the patient and her family deprived of mental peace and some hard-earned green stuff.

When the costliest of medicines and gadgets get recommended by physicians, stakeholders of pharmaceutical companies and those in the field of medical equipment laugh all the way to the bank. Admittedly, quite a lot of money gets pumped into research and development, but it is open to debate as to how much profit could be considered rational and socially justified.

Much like the marketing honchos in the private sector who bring in business and resultant moolah, such physicians happen to be the blue-eyed boys of any entity which boasts of being a corporate facility.

The grey eyed ones

Physicians who are part of the government healthcare delivery system and happen to be conscientious by nature are often overloaded with work. Monetary rewards are often not commensurate with the efforts being put in. The eyes of a majority of them would be a dull grey, revealing a soul which is tormented and has given up hope.

Besides having to publish research papers in peer-reviewed journals and making presentations at medical seminars, students have to be guided, examinations have to be conducted and internal meetings need to be attended. Administrative chores cannot be ignored.

Above all, routine patient care cannot be made to suffer. Patients, whether of the ‘in’ or the ‘out’ kind, descend in droves, all eager to jump the queue and catch the attention of the physician. The plight of those in most of the emerging economies is most distressing because the per capita availability of physicians leaves much to be desired.

Of Attitude and Inner Resilience

Much depends on the attitude of a patient. One could come across persons with a cheerful disposition headed for their second open heart surgery, relishing a deep-fried item with much glee. One could also run into those who worry endlessly over such transient ailments as a bout of common cold or sinusitis.

Physicians obviously deal with a baffling variety of patients with much finesse and aplomb. Nerves of chilled steel get deployed. A sense of detachment pervades their handling of a patient. Their inner resilience deserves to be applauded.

With such fine qualities of head and heart, one can merely admire the quality of their work which keeps upholding the reputation of their profession. The Hippocratic Oath might appear to be relegated to the background, but is surely alive and kicking.

In many streams of alternative medicine, the patient is taken as a composite whole and treated holistically. The inner resilience of a patient is accorded a higher weightage. Allopathy, the mainstay of masses in the times we live in, does it the other way round, where each organ is looked at and treated separately. In mathematical parlance, alternative streams could be likened to Integral Calculus, whereas allopathy could be likened to Differential Calculus.

Shoring up one’s inner resilience

There are indeed ways for patients to improve one’s inner resilience, so as to be able to handle the harsh slings and arrows of Fate in a more positive manner. A deeper inner connection helps. To achieve the same, regular introspection and meditation helps.

As the Mother has said, the right approach would be to simply disallow negative thoughts to gain a foothold in one’s psychical system. Patients obviously need loads of patience to be able to put this advice in practice!

(Notes:

This forms part of an article which has appeared in NAMAH:

NAMAH_OCTOBER_2017

Inputs from Dr. Shivani Salil Dr. Shruti Bhatia are gratefully acknowledged.)

(Related Post: https://ashokbhatia.wordpress.com/2017/06/04/of-patient-satisfaction-quotient-motivation-and-kinds-of-patients)

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